Chikonzero Nei Uchifanira Kurega Rudo Pakutanga Kuona

Zvemukati

• Ongororo ye

Rudo pakutanga pakuona-hwaro hwezviroto zvakawanda zvevachiri kuyaruka, zvinyorwa, nziyo dzepop, uye yega yega rom-com. Asi vatsvagiri vari pano kuzoputika matariro edu erudo asina tariro (kugomera, sainzi). Zvinoitika, rudo chairwo uye kuwana mweya wako wepamoyo haubvi pamanzwiro ako kekutanga maziso ako kukiya, asi pachinzvimbo pahuwandu chaihwo hwenguva iyo vanhu vanopedza vari pamwe chete, maererano nekudzidza kutsva kubva kuYunivhesiti yeTexas, Austin. (Ungasarudza Sparks Pamusoro Pehukama Hwakagadzikana?)

Vatsvakurudzi vakabvunzurudza 167 vakaroorana muhukama kubva pamwedzi mishoma kusvika kumakore makumi mashanu nemashanu (chaizvo watinofanira kunge tichitora mazano kubva!) Nezvekuti vakasangana sei, vakadanana kwenguva yakareba sei, uye kuti vakafunga kuti mumwe wavo aive akanaka sei. Vakabva vaita vatorwa vayere kunaka kwemumwe nemumwe wavo. Vakaroorana vaive shamwari dzakarebesa vasati vatanga kudanana vaiwanzo "kusanzwisiswa" pakukwezva kune chinangwa mumaonero evokunze, zvichireva kuti vamwe vaifunga kuti mumwe aiyevedza kupfuura mumwe. Izvi zvinoshamisika tichitarisa kutsvagurudza kwakapfuura kwakaratidza kuti isu tiri mukana wekuroorana nemumwe munhu akafanana nesu mune zvese kutaridzika uye kukwezva. (Zvakanyanya kupesana zvinokwezva!) Asi shiri dzerudo kwenguva refu dzakazvikoshesa seyakaenzana, zvichiita kuti vaongorori vatende kuti yaive nguva yekuwedzera iyo "yakafananidza" runako rwavo, zvirinani mupfungwa dzavo. Mhedziso yemasayendisiti: Kana ukagara uchiziva mumwe munhu, unowedzera kukwezvwa naye.

Pfungwa yekuti rudo nekukwezva zvinokura nenguva zvinonyanya kuitika kuvakadzi, anodaro Wendy Walsh, Ph.D., nyanzvi yehukama isina hukama nechidzidzo uye munyori we The 30-Day Love Detox. "Kuti mukadzi awire murudo zvechokwadi, anofanira kudzorera maseru uye kuona zviri pasi pechimiro."

Walsh anoti makore ake ekuongorora nezvehukama akamuratidza kuti varume vanotanga kutsvaga runako mumurume/mukadzi, zvichiteverwa nemutsa, kuvimbika, uye njere apo vakadzi vanotarisa kugadzikana kwemurume kutanga, kuteverwa nehungwaru, mutsa, uyezve kutaridzika kwekupedzisira. "Ndokusaka zvakapusa kana varume vatora pikicha yeABS yavo ndokuiisa panzvimbo dzekufambidzana. Kunze kwekunge ivo vari kungotsvaga yekukochekera, handizvo izvo vakadzi vanoda kuziva," anodaro. "Nzira chete iyo vakadzi (nevarume) vanogona kuziva hunhu hwakakosha ndeyekushandisa nguva nemunhu iyeye." (Asi kana wangowana munhu iyeye, zvinotokuita kuti uve noutano hwakanaka! Ziva Kuti Hukama Hwako Hwakabatana Sei Noutano Hwako.)

Asi kana zvasvika pakunyatsoita nguva yakadii yekupa hukama hutsva, Walsh anoti zvinoenderana nevakaroorana uye yavo yakasarudzika mamiriro. Anonongedzera kuti vamwe vanhu vanogona kuzivana kwemwedzi, asi vakangobuda kaviri chete, nepo vamwe vangangodaro vakasangana mavhiki maviri apfuura uye vakataura kwemaawa zuva rega rega parunhare kubvira. Kutonga kwake kwechigunwe? Usaite chero sarudzo nezveramangwana rehukama kusvika wasangana nedzinza remumwe wako, zvichireva mhuri yake, shamwari, uye vaunoshanda navo. Nenguva iyo munhu anokusuma kune vese vanhu vakakosha muhupenyu hwavo, iwe unogona kunge wavaziva kwenguva yakakwana kuti ubvumire pfungwa chaiyo yekukwezva kuti iitike uye kwete kuchiva chete, anotsanangura.

Asi nguva ndizvo chaizvo izvo vazhinji vedu tisina munharaunda yedu yekumhanyisa-inova ndiyo inoita kuti kufambidzana seTinder uye Ingori Chikafu chemanheru chinokwezva (uye pane Iwo mashanu Anonyanya Kushatisa Zvepabonde Zvishandiso zvakare ...). Walsh anoti tsika yedu yekufambidzana zvishoma asi kukochekerana kwakawanda inogona kuva dambudziko chairo kana uchitsvaga mumwe mweya. Chidzidzo ichi chinoratidza izvozvo.

Saka sarira vese avo Ryan Gosling mafirimu-anoregedza parudo pakutanga kuona chingave chinhu chakanakisa chaungaite kune yako yerudo hupenyu!

Ongororo ye