Usarega: Hupenyu Hwangu Makore gumi nemaviri Mushure meProstate Cancer Kuongororwa

Vadiwa Shamwari,

Pandakanga ndava nemakore makumi mana nemaviri, ndakaziva kuti ndaive nekenza yekufa yekenza Ndakanga ndine metastasis mumapfupa angu, mapapu, uye lymph node. My prostate-specific antigen (PSA) level yaive pamusoro pe3,200, uye chiremba wangu akandiudza kuti ndaive negore kana mashoma ekurarama.

Izvi zvaive makore anoda kusvika gumi nemaviri apfuura.

Mavhiki mashoma ekutanga aive asina kujeka. Ndakaitwa biopsies, CT scan, uye mabonzo scans, uye mhedzisiro yega yakadzoka yakaipa kupfuura yekupedzisira. Pfungwa yangu yepasi-pasi yakauya panguva yebhaopsy sekucherechedza kwevadzidzi vaviri vechidiki mukoti. Handina kugadzikana, uye ndakanyarara ndichichema sezvavaikurukura bundu racho.

Ndakatanga kurapwa kwehomoni ipapo, uye mukati memavhiki maviri, kupenya kwakatanga. Zvirinani amai vangu neni takazogovana chimwe chinhu chakafanana, ndakafunga. Asi kushushikana kwakatanga kugara mukati apo ini ndainzwa hunhu hwangu kutsvedza huchienda.

Ndakanzwa kubvarurwa. Hupenyu hwangu hwainge hwadzoka mugwara. Ini ndanga ndichisimuka mune zvemari, ndaidanana nemusikana wangu anoshamisa, uye isu takanga tichitarisira kuvaka hupenyu pamwe chete.

Zvingadai zvakave nyore kutsvedza mukunyanya kusimba dai zvisiri zvezvinhu zviviri. Kutanga, kutenda kwangu muna Mwari, uye chechipiri, mwenga wangu akanaka. Haana kunditendera kuti ndikande mapfumo pasi; akatenda, uye haana kusiya. Akanditengera kayak, akanditengera bhasikoro, uye akandiita kuti ndishandise zvese zviri zviviri. Rwiyo "Rarama Senge Waive Uchifa" naTim McGraw rakava ruzha kuhupenyu hwangu, uye mapisarema 103, ndima 2-3 yakava mantra yangu. Ini ndaidzokorora mavhesi iwayo pandakatadza kurara, uye ndichifungisisa pawo pandainetseka kuti chii chaizonzwa kufa. Pakupedzisira, ndakatanga kutenda kuti ramangwana raigona kuitika.

Muroora wangu akandiroora gore mushure mekuonekwa kwangu. Pazuva remuchato wedu, ndakamuvimbisa makore makumi matatu.

Ndisati ndave nekenza, ndinoverenga hupenyu hwangu husina maturo. Ndakanga ndiri munhu anoshanda, handina kumboenda kuzororo, uye ndaingozvifunga. Ndakanga ndisiri munhu kwaye. Kubva zvandakaongororwa, ndakadzidza kuda zvakadzama uye kutaura zvinonaka. Ndakava murume ari nani, baba vari nani, shamwari iri nani, uye murume ari nani. Ini ndinoramba ndichishanda izere nguva, asi ini ndinopa iyo yekuwedzeredza nguva pazvinogoneka. Tinopedza zhizha redu pamusoro pemvura uye munguva yedu yechando mumakomo. Hazvina basa nemwaka, isu tinogona kuwanikwa tichifamba, kuchovha, kana kayaking. Hupenyu kushamisa, kunoshamisa kukwira.

Ini ndinofunga nezve kenza yeprostate se "frenemy" yangu hombe. Zvave zvisiri nyore; Kenza yeprostate yandibira shuwa yemuroora wangu. Gomarara iri rakaomesesa kune vatinoshanda navo, avo vanogona kunzwa vasingadiwe, vasingadiwe, uye vasingadiwe. Asi isu hatina kuibvumira kuti ibvise hukama hwedu hwepanyama kana kuba mufaro wedu. Kune ese akaoma kenza yeprostate yaunza, ndinogona kutaura pachokwadi kuti ndechimwe chezvipo zvikuru zvandakambowana. Zvakachinja hupenyu hwangu. Kufungidzira zvese.

Musi waJune 6, 2018, ndichapemberera gore rangu regumi nemaviri-gore kubvira kuongororwa. Kenza inoramba isingaonekwe. Ini ndinopfuurira kurapwa kumwe chete kwandave ndiri kwemwedzi yekupedzisira makumi mashanu nematanhatu, kurapwa kwangu kwechitatu kubvira parwendo urwu.

Gomarara harina simba. Izvo zvinogona chete kutora kubva kwatiri izvo zvatinozvitendera kuti zviite. Hapana chivimbiso chemangwana. Izvo hazvina basa kana isu tichirwara kana takagwinya, isu tese tiri terminal. Zvese zvakakosha ndizvo zvatinoita muno uye ikozvino. Ini ndinosarudza kuita chimwe chinhu chinoshamisa nayo.

Ndinoona kuti gomarara rinotyisa. Hapana munhu anoda kunzwa mazwi "une kenza," asi iwe unofanirwa kupfuura. Zano rangu kune chero murume akawanikwa aine chirwere ichi chakaora nderiri:

Usatendera kenza kutora nzvimbo yepakati muhupenyu hwako. Pane nguva pakati pekuongororwa uye kufa. Kazhinji, pane yakawanda nguva. Ita chimwe chinhu nacho. Seka, ude, uye unakirwe zuva rega rega sekunge ndiko kwekupedzisira kwako. Kupfuura zvese, iwe unofanirwa kutenda mune ramangwana. Sayenzi yezvokurapa yasvika kure kubva pandakaongororwa. Kune mishonga mitsva iri kuongororwa mazuva ese, uye mushonga urikuuya. Ini ndakamboti kana ndikagona kuwana mwedzi mitanhatu kubva pane kurapa kwese kuripo, ndinogona kurarama makore makumi matatu uyezve mamwe.

Vanababa, pane tariro.

Pachokwadi,

Todd

Todd Seals murume, baba, sekuru, blogger, mutsigiri anotsigira, uye ane makore gumi nemaviri nhanho yechina gomarara reprostate kubva kuSilver Lake, Washington. Akaroora kune rudo rwehupenyu hwake, uye pamwe chete, vanofarira kufamba, vanokwira mabhasikoro, vatyairi vechando, vanofamba-famba, vanokwira zvikepe, uye vanomutsa vanokwira. Anorarama hupenyu hwake zvinonzwika zuva rega rega kunyangwe hazvo chirwere chekenza chichiwanikwa.